Brenda Quiles, a concerned woman from Oak Park, Illinois, has written an open letter to Volusia county about Sharks. It was published in the Orlando Sentinel. It is very funny.

May 11, 2008

I am concerned about the repetitious shark bites in New Smyrna Beach. I am aware that as of Wednesday there has been an 11th shark bite in Volusia County this year. The most recent one is to a 6-year-old boy.

Correct!

And isn't little Zane Atacha a cutey patoot?

As a tourist, I previously visited New Smyrna Beach and did not notice any posting about the multiple shark bites in New Smyrna Beach.

Like this one?

I am asking Volusia County officials to minimize these shark bites by closing this beach, increasing warnings and lookouts for sharks and advising the public with increased postings throughout the beach area.

You're shitting us right? This is sure to be great for business.

I am also asking county officials to increase awareness of these shark bites by implementing new policies and procedures to limit the number of victims.

There is no reason for there to be 11 shark bites thus far in 2008 and for a 6-year-old child to fall prey to a shark bite when strict newer policies and procedures should have been implemented. With so many shark bites, this beach should be closed. The county is turning a blind eye to providing safety for the public in New Smyrna Beach.

And this expert opinion is based on what? Are you a beach safety aficionado or the resident Shark expert of Oak Park, Illinois? All of these 11 Shark bites were minor and required only a couple of stitches...compare that to a injuries at a local skate park or ski resort. So the entire New Smyrna economy is supposed to be torpedoed because a a couple dozen bathers get snacky-toed?

Hell yeah there's more!

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