Hi, El Tiburon here. Since there were two Shark bites in Mexico last weekend and I am Mexican, I thought I'd weigh in. What you didn't hear that there were two awesome Shark parties in beaches close to Acapulco last weekend? Now you have.

This is what is left of 49-year-old American Bruce Grimes's hand. He was chomped on Saturday while surfing off Playa Linda Beach. The original report was that he lost his thumb, but this picture seems to reveal that his thumb is still there with the rest of his hand, held together with a hundred stitches.
Read.

This is a picture of Friday's unlucky partier--21-year-old Osvaldo Mata Valdovinos, who was was jammed to death while surfing near Zihuatanejo. Sharky originally said that it was probably a Tiger Shark that took off Osvaldo's hand and broke through the bone on one of his legs that caused him to bleed to death, but new reports say that the Shark was only 6-feet-long. Hmmmm...that might bring the Bull Shark--the usual suspect--into the front running.
Read.

One thing is sure. Unlike the response to the death of Adrian Ruiz in April, the Mexican authorities are taking a more moderate response to the Shark activity. There has yet to be another documented Shark holocaust. Of course American conservative bloggers that shall go unnamed because I don't want to help their google search results, are saying that it was only common sense to kill as many local Sharks as possible whenever there is a Shark incident. Less Sharks = Less Shark attacks, they argue. Under the same logic all Dogs should be slaughtered because they bite people all the time. If we turned this into a blog about Dog bites we would run out of server space in about two days. Oh well, it is easier to slaughter Sharks than it is to deal with the real problem--changing climate patterns that are fucking up the migratory patterns of the natural prey of Sharks and thus fucking up the migratory patterns of Sharks...oh, and the pesky issue of the tragic over-development of the coastline that is fucking up the breeding grounds of Bull Sharks, among other species, and forcing them into contact with people.

Murder! It is so much easier than using your brain.

--El Tiburon

technorati tags: Sharks, Shark Bites, Shark Attacks, Bull Sharks, Tiger Sharks, Mexico, Dogs, Dog Bites, Republicans, Conservatives, Google, blogging, surfing, Zihuatanejo

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Last week there were three "coyote incidents" in Southern California, all on children. While not nearly as fun or interesting as Shark incidents, nothing quite strikes fear in the hearts of square white Americans than the thought of feral beasts dragging their children out of their sandboxes. Well, maybe the thought of a black president is scarier to square white suburban Americans than a Coyote attack but this is not a political blog so we will leave that issue alone. Instead, let's explore the wonderful world of Coyotes!

COYOTE PARTIES!
There have been more than 100 reported attempted Coyote predations on people in Southern California since the 1970s, but this number seems to be rising every year. Half of these attempted predations were on children 10 and under. Why so many "incidents?" It is fairly simple: there are more shitty suburbs encroaching into coyote habitat. In the suburbs of San Bernardino, Los Angeles, Orange County, and San Diego suburbs are literally carved into former wilderness areas. Oftentimes, Coyotes will eat suburban pets like Dogs and Cats as they are the size and type of prey they would normally be after in the wild. The problem is, toddlers are fairly small too. Since the three Coyote parties last week involved very small children there are not so many pictures of them floating around the internet. So we have created our own pictorial we made in honor of the humble Coyote, the closest square white suburbans ever get to interacting with predators...outside of mortgage lenders, credit card companies...and um, the internet.

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