Attention Whalers, You Have Very Very Small Penises.
Believe it!
In a move that showed just how corrupt the Japanese Whaling program is, the Institute of Cetacean Research--the shell corporation that oversees Japanese Whaling--cleared their own employees of all charges of stealing "research" Whale parts for sale as meat on the black market.
In another move that proves the unashamed self-interest of interested parties, the Japanese government finally released Greenpeace activists Junichi Sato and Toru Suzuki, 41 who were arrested on June 20 for breaking the story of the Whale Meat theft. They were held without parole for 26 days, and are still being charged with theft and trespassing. In other words: they are being charged for stealing the same Whale meat that they themselves discovered Japanese whalers were stealing. Talk about a railroad job!
Seriously, Wut?
Not that we want to poke fun at anti-Whaling protesters...but, we like our graphic better.
Read.
Japanese Whaling--corrupt, decadent, bloody, shamelessly unjust!
--El Tiburon
technorati tags: Whales, Japan, Whaling, Tokyo, Greenpeace, Institute of Cetacean Research, International Law, Junichi Sato, Toru Suzuki
Anti-fishing--Jihad?
Want to know why Massholes have been reporting so many Great White sightings lately? It's a way to promote their shitty Shark tournament. Eight hundred fishermen have gathered this weekend for the 22nd annual Monster Shark Tournament in Oak Bluffs, a town on Martha's Vineyard, Massachusetts. The grand prize is $50,000 and we are presuming toothy blow jobs from the local bar skanks. But it isn't all shits and giggles. The Humane Society, among others with brains and who are comfortable with their sexuality are not happy about the world's largest Shark tournament.
Wendy Benchley, wife of the late Peter Benchley, author of Jaws said:
"Killing for the sake of killing, to get the biggest animal, is a fake macho ethic. My husband often said he would not write `Jaws' nowadays. It is time for a new ethic of the ocean."
[source]
Steven James, tournament organizer, massive tool, and president of the Boston Big Game Fishing Club, disagrees, calling the those with brains and who are comfortable with their sexuality, an "anti-fishing jihad."
Jihad? We aren't the one's doing the killing, big guy.
This year, only endangered Mako, Thresher, and Porbeagle Sharks are allowed to be wasted, and brought onto the docks, sometimes still alive to be gutted before the confused crowd.
The town voted earlier this year to keep the bloody hubris-dripping tournament, but voted to deny the tournament a liquor license, so those who want to watch Shark guts hit the deck at the weigh in will need to BYOB or get tanked at one of the many local overpriced, tourist-trappy bars.
"There's a whole lot of people who really like the spectacle of it," said Greg Coogan, 59, a selectman. "That's what summers are about, letting people do what they want to do."
Ah, yes, American freedom! Do you think the town of Oak Bluffs would allow he-who-channels-Sharky to throw a all holds barred drug and firework party for a bunch of his angry ex-con anarchist friends? Summers are all about letting people do what they want to do right?
You guys like animal cruelty? Watch:
Steven James is an American! Hell ya!
--Sharky
technorati tags: Sharks, Mako Sharks, Porbeagle Sharks, Massachusetts, Oak Bluffs, Martha's Vineyard, Thresher Sharks, Shark Fishing, Oak Bluffs Monster Shark Tournament, HSUS, Peter Benchley, Jaws, Great White Sharks, Princeton, New Jersey
They See China Rollin', They Hatin'!
This week a meeting of the Convention for International Trade in Endangered Species (CITES) has allowed China to bid on 108 tons of Elephant Ivory from Botswana, Namibia, South Africa, and Zimbabwe. International trade in Elephant ivory was banned in 1989. In 1999 a one time sale of Ivory was allowed to Japan. Conservationists believe that allowing the sale of ivory, even in one time limited sales, contributes to the murdering and poaching of Elephants. The Ivory trade almost made Elephants extinct before 1989.
Robbie Marsland, UK director of the International Fund for Animal Welfare, which wants an outright ban on the trade, said: "We are deeply disappointed. The decision plays Russian roulette with wild elephants. Allowing new ivory to be imported into China will stimulate demand and create a smokescreen for illegal ivory to be laundered into the legal market."
[source]
Why was China allowed to bid on such a large stockpile of cruel Elephant contraband? China argued that it needed to promote the ivory carving tradition as a cultural imperative. What is even more awesome about this sale of ivory, is that the proceeds will likely benefit human rights abusing and terrorist supporting regimes like Robert Mugave's in Zimbabwe. Hooray!
Want to see the "cultural tradition" that China wishes to promote?
An ivory covered BMW worth 2.4 million, BLING BLING!
Want to see more of this blood-wagon?
Proof that Saving Sharks is More Bad Ass than Killing Sharks
This 9-foot Grey Nurse shark was discovered with a foreign object lodged in her throat in the Cape Byron Marine Park, yesterday. Grey Nurse Sharks, a species extremely similar to the North American Sand Tiger Shark, is critically endangered. A squad of experts from Sea World, the New South Wales Fisheries Department and the Byron Bay Marine Park Authority jumped into action.
Three divers found her over 45 feet deep, where they lassoed her and led her into the "Challenger," a sea life transport tube. Then they got her onto the boat and proceeded trying to remove the foreign object with the help of a large pvc pipe.
David Blyde, marine veterinarian and general badass, leads the surgical team by jamming his hand down the Shark's throat.
[source]
Massholes Got Their Great White
With the bullshit Great White sighting last week off Martha's Vineyard, Massachusetts residents must have been antsy to prove that there actually are Great Whites off their coast. Rejoice Massholes!
A seven-foot female Great White washed up on a beach in Nantucket on Monday and was discovered by children. It isn't that we are dubious of the possibility of an occasional Great White cruising chowderhead beaches, it's just that if you are gonna yell Great White on the 4th of July, be realistic about the size.
[source]
There was some debate as to whether the Shark in question is a Great White or Mako, but we really don't have to get into that do we, that would be wicked retarded.
--Sharky
technorati tags: Sharks, Martha's Vineyard, Nantucket, Massachusetts, Great White Sharks, Mako Sharks
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